endings and beginnings – faith? – 2/15/13

On a walk, years ago, I heard God say to me,  “man does not live by expectations alone,  but by every word that proceeds out of the mouth of God”.   It was a strong lesson, a  dawning realization that my expectations are not the same as God’s calls on my life. Sometimes it takes little shocks to the system to tell the difference.

what of beginnings
that have no endings
or perhaps never really got started
but froze to a stop
barely out the door

it wasn’t important enough
to push other things
off the plate of
competition  for attention

perhaps the skill set required
never quite made it
“over the hill between
barely passable”
and “others connect when you do it”

what then
was it a new beginning
aborted before it really got going?
I wanted to be Moses
but that was only a dream.

some disappointments
are invitations
to fight on
to go yet further
in your dream pursuit

and some are reality checks
that open a choice
between your best calling
and your own wishful thinking

may these shocks
come clear
and may we hear
beyond our grieving
when we must let go
but we really don’t want to
we want to hang on
and keep trying
working hard
refusing to accept
that our expectations
might be mistaken

when is keeping on
and when is it
foolish insistence on our own way?


About Clark W Johnson

I am a poet, interested in using poetry to explore my interactions with the spiritual. I find poetry captures tension, paradox and flow well enough so I can hold experiences at arms length and reflect on them from multiple vantage points. As I walk deeper with my God, I'm finding such a record invaluable for myself, and I find that pieces and parts touch others as well. I love and long for more points of contact along those lines.
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